Friendship is about being together through the highs and lows of life. No friendship is real if it only lasts in the happy times and has no significance during the bad times. Breakup is one of the low times in a person’s life when they need their friends.
No matter how distant your friend feels during the time, no matter how hard they are trying to push you away during this time you don’t leave them rather you stick with them. So, here are some tips that could help you deal with a friend going through a breakup.
1. Ask instead of assuming
Every relationship is different and so is every breakup, so it is wise of you to not just assume that things would work out in the same way with your friend as they worked out with you. Everyone has a different and unique healing process so it would be mature of you to not just assume and force things on your friend, instead, you should ask them about what they want and how would they want to handle this situation. So, it is always advisable to directly ask your friend and not just do things according to your suitability.
2. Listen and be patient
This post-breakup phase is tough for your friend and you being a good friend should stick with them through it and not be someone who only supports a friend in their good times. You just have to be there for them listening to everything they have to say and being patient about how things go. Your friend is not going to heal overnight and you should just accept that instead of being mad at them for not being themselves lately.
3. Do not bash the ex
There are a lot of chances that your friend was in a bad relationship and even had a bad breakup compelling you to just bash their ex and ramble about all the red flags of their relationship as soon as it ends, but this is surely something we would not advise you. There are a lot of chances that you are wishing well for your friend but they totally misunderstand everything in their vulnerable state and even lash out at you for saying all this. This type of negative talking is what you should avoid as it would not be helpful at all.
4. Help them reinvent themselves
It is true that it takes time to get over a breakup but this time shouldn’t last forever. So, once enough grieving has been done you should encourage your friend to start living their life again. We aren’t suggesting that you do this on the very next day of the breakup but you should do this after some time. You should accompany your friend in doing some of the activities they love, you should encourage them to get back on track.
5. Give them space
This is a tough phase for your friend and they might be struggling inside their own head, so if they ask you for space you should surely respect their boundaries and give them the needed space.
6. Don’t expect them to do things your way
Everyone is different and everyone feels in a different way. You should not just expect your friend to do things according to you, they have a life of their own, they have their own way of handling things and you should respect that instead of getting mad at them for that. You should avoid passing judgment at this stage and be compassionate instead.
7. Help them find a therapist if needed
You don’t clearly see everything sometimes. Maybe the breakup was a lot for your friend to handle and even if you are not able to help them in this situation, so you need to help them get professional help. You should try and get them to a therapist to help them get over this phase and move on in life.